The Charter from Hell "GiddyUp gets slammed by,,,,,,"
Capt. John GiddyUp-Bunch
January 25, 2009
Fort Myers - Saltwater Fishing Report
By popular request, I'll disclose what actually happened on Jan 7, 2009. The implications of the following event resulted in 3 Broken Ribs (#'s 7-8-9) and a busted mouth. Ready? GiddyUp
It was a day of great promise for Grouper Trolling. My pickup was at Punta Rassa (at foot of Sanibel Causeway). The agreed time was 0800 which has nothing whatsoever to do with the story. Grouper were knowm to be knocking the nuts off of Big Lip + 25' Divers. Yo-Zuri Hydro-Mags. OK?
As my boat approaches the dock, I notice a large crowd at the end of the dock. The police had just ordered the crowd to "break it up" and the crowd soon dispursed. The entire crowd started walking towards my boat. What I thought was 40-50 people were my 2 charter customers. Senor and Senorita LARGO. How big were Mr and Mrs Largo? They were so big I thought the 2 of them would exceed my 11 person USCG limit. Again, how big were they? They were so big I needed two Dingys as PFD's for them. Upon Mr and Mrs Largo stepping on my boat, I was very grateful to own an Andros 23 Cuda with high free board. How big were they? As soon as they sat down the bilge kicked on and ran for the next 20 minutes! Getting under way was of the highest priority.
I knew it would be a tough day as I idled out of the No-Wake Zone. From seemingly nowhere, HARPOONS started bouncing and deflecting off my boat. Cries of "There she blows" rang out over San Carlos Bay. To add insult to injury, would you believe I was ticketed for possession of 2 manatees in a manatee zone? (Just kidding but a FWC did give me a dirty look).
By the time I made my exit out of Red Fish Pass, 2,000-3,000 Greenpeace Protesters had gathered on the beach in a massive protest. Undeterred, GiddyUp heads to 35Ft of water in choppy seas. Everything was biting. Kings, cobia, and Grouper.
Senor and Senorita Largo were really excited as before we left the dock at Punta Rassa they told me how important getting enough fish "to take home" for a fish fry was to them. I thought to myself "hmmm, no kidding." The seas seemed to get more angry by the minute. Just before making the decision to go back inside because of high seas/winds, I spotted a BIG TRIPLETAIL hanging off a crab trap float. Being the expert that I am, I threw a cork float downwind with the sun to my back. As I got ready to hand the rod to Senorita Largo, she lost her sea legs (trunks in this case) and fell into me harder than a Defensive End hits an unprotected QB from the blind side. Have you ever seen a Left Offensive Tackle miss a block on a speedy Right Defensive End? By complete accident, La Muchacha drove me so hard into the bottom of my boat that I thought she had killed me. Blood was pouring out of my mouth (I thought it was internal injuries but it was only me almost biting my tongue off). Me with no tongue? SHOOT ME! Anyway, I was stunned for a good 5 minutes but there was a bigger problem. HOW DO I GET THIS BIG B**** OFF OF ME? To make a long story short, Senor Largo helped pull her off. She was laughing and breathing right into my face. Her breath would have knocked a Buzzard off a S*** Wagon. As a parting shot, she farted when Senor Largo finally pulled her off. This frightened me because 1 pro-longed blast usually means a dock departure by a large vessel.
These are the facts. It was an accident. I hold no grudge. I was re-xrayed yesterday because I was worried about puncturing a lung. The Doctor said 4-6 weeks after Jan 7th and he said 2-3 weeks more yesterday.
Do I give a Rat's Ass if they ever fish with me again? No. I learned an invalueable lesson. Something told me not to take them 3-5 miles offshore. Some people are simply not equipped physically to deal with such challenges. A pitching boat and rough seas is a formula for trouble. Know this my fellow anglers. It was a lesson. It was a tough lesson. And when I look in the mirror, I see fault in me not Senor and Senorita Largo. Just when I thought I knew it all this happens. Common sense told me to stay inside but I couldn't resist the big bite I knew would be happening. I HAVE NO ONE TO BLAME BUT MYSELF. Both Largo's got seasick as well. It was the charter from hell but we did score Grouper Limits and one nice Tripletail.
Upon returning to Punta Rassa, I went straight to the hospital. 2 maybe 3 weeks I'll have another report for you. How big were they really? Had she fellen out of the boat, the tidal surge would have exceeded KATRINA!
Fort Myers Fishing Forecast:
If you wish to fish, call me as I know the best guides in SW FL. Warming trend should produce good results this week. 239-283-8838 (There are some great guides who take Our Troops fishing for free. Check out www.operationopenarms.com and click on "Fishing"
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