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Southwest Florida Fishing Report - Bonita Springs to Captiva
Capt. John GiddyUp-Bunch
January 12, 2008
Fort Myers - Saltwater Fishing Report
As you know, my fishing reports contain ZERO PASSED GAS. With this planted soundbite (Blazing Saddles) I offer you this honest analysis of things in SW FL. Fishing is on the slow side. The cold snap we had dropped the water temps so fast that hundreds of snook were lost and other fish suffered the same fate. PLS don't write me and offer your psychoanalysis of my "attitude." My fishing reports represent reality not fantasy. With that said, here are the highlights-lowlights.
Permit: On a charter 4 days ago (Jan 7th) and for the second time, a GiddyUp Fishing Charter ran into (literally) the largest Permit school I've ever seen. The students of the school did not wish to play. We threw everything at these bastards. Live crabs (small, medium, and large), shrimp (live), Pompano jigs in all F-colors, DOA Rootbeer TerrOeyes. Nada. And know this fellow anglers, yours truly directly (suggested) the cast be (always) made to the outside of the school as to not scare them. In other words, I just didn't fall off the F-Turnip Truck. Nothing. Zilch. Not a single hook-up. Two hours+ of romancing and trying everything. It was like being in the back seat at the Drive-In Movie when you were 15. All indicators were green but you went home with a stomach ache. Yup, a code red.
So, if that excites you, God bless you because we didn't catch one of those MUTHAS. Finally I sat down in the boat, lit a cigar, and started laughing. My charter customers wondered what the heck I was doing.
"There is only one way we can get these fish to bite" I announced. They were breathing heavy and wide eyed.
"You must ask your wife to put her lips in the water and wiggle them." Enter the 1,000 mile stare. Several minutes go by, He says "Honey.... and she stops him mid-sentence "Don't you even think about it!" We had a blast trying.
We came into Redfish Pass and looked for Pompano. Nothing. Trout saved the day. DOA Electric Chicken Shrimp near the good ole Fish Shacks. We tried for Redfish with cut ladyfish and didn't catch jack****
So, there you have it. Thank God I am paid to find fish and not to make them bite. I know everyone who reads my reports looks for some sexual reference from me. As I don't want to disappoint you, I think those Permit were more interested in doing the aquatic mumbo than eating. Think about it. When it is time for some great sex, do you feel eating like a burger and fries?
Only George Castanza has pulled this off. GiddyUp!
PS: I'll be one of the featured seminar speakers at the Florida Sportsman Magazine Show on Feb 2-3 at the Lee County Civic Center in Ft Myers. Lasy year they had me on the Offshore and Inshore stages. As well, I'll be at the Miami Boat Show. Come see me at the Honda Marine Display. Then off to do the same Florida Sportsman Mag Show in Sarasota. This is a link to my latest column. I have received 15 marriage proposals in 48 hours. Only 3 applicants had boats. All 3 ladies are widows in the 80's. Hey, old people need love too. Don't knock it until you knock it. GiddyUp! http://display.naplesnews.com/SS/Page.aspx?sstarg=&facing=false&secid=38292&pagenum=24
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